One More Year...

Well, i did it...

I went ahead and re-signed my lease, in order to stay in my same apartment for another year.

I was thinking about moving out, but if I moved then I would REALLY miss the Ghost in my apartment who I have grown to love so much!

It would be like breaking up with a lover!

I was tempted to move...so, I made a list of pros and cons.  The 'Pros' won.

First of all, i absolutely hate moving!  I spent so many years of my life moving from place to place, that it feels good to finally be in the same location for a while.

I've been in my apartment for a few years now, and was considering moving, in order to get a little bit bigger or nicer place.

However, my leasing company sweetened the deal by NOT raising my rent!  This is the first time my rent won't be going up since i moved there.  When I saw that on the lease, I pretty much peed my pants in shock! 

I ran to grab a Boniva as fast as possible!

Also, I have been so busy with work and life lately, that I sort of just let time fly by, and didn't get a chance to really look around for a new place.

So...one more year it is!

Casper (my ghost) would miss me too much.  I mean, who else would I get to fondle me in the middle of the night?!

I'm fine with this decision, as I am pretty comfortable where I am.  I like the neighborhood, I like the building management, and the apartment has everything that I need for my lifestyle.

I've never really had to deal with loud neighbors, or other apartment-living annoyances, so it will be ok.

I do remember about a year ago, the guy who lived who below me had a tendency to sing. 

Sing LOUD. 

Yeah, i had to stomp on the floor a couple of times, but then he got the hint!  :)

Which reminds me of this great little video:

Enjoy!

Rough Days, Y'all!

Ooh, I am tellin' you...the last couple of days have been BRUTAL!

I rarely ever talk about work on this blog, but I have had some rough days at work lately.  Without going into too much boring detail, I have been worked to the bone!  My spirit has been rather low, but hopefully things will improve soon.

You know how it is in this economy:  Less people are required to do much more work, and it is exhausting! 

Yes, I am very grateful to have a job, so I don't want this to seem like I am complaining, but I sure hope that the economy improves enough soon that we can all stop killing ourselves in the workplace!

So what can I do for a little more calmness in my life?

Well...

By following simple advice heard on the Oprah show, you too can find inner peace.

Dr. Oz proclaimed, 'The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished.'

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house today, I finished off a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Tequila, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my Boniva prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now!

:)

I have to give thanks to my amazing Co-worker Anna, for letting me vent and never telling me to shut-up!  And for sending me this super funny joke yesterday when I needed it the most!

Here's to a better rest of the week...

Weekend, hurry the F up!

Oh, Tanith!

Thank you, Tanith Belbin!

I had no idea that she was so damn popular!

For those of you faithful 'Dangling Carrot'ers, you know that last Friday I posted about the Olympics starting, and I included a photo of Ice Dancing couple Tanith & Belbin.

Well, Geez Louise!...In the last few days, my blog statistics have gone through the roof!

I mean, here I thought that you all were just so fascinated with my amazing writing skills, and my clever wittiness that you were continually coming back for more.

It turns out, that y'all were just Google-searching for Tanith!

Yes, it's true. 

While looking at my keyword-search activity, hundreds & hundreds of people have been linked to my blog because they were looking for the blonde, American beauty.

Tanith Belbin.

(Just had to write her name again;  If it brings more people here, then I will keep saying it!)

TANITH BELBIN!  (Shameless, Paul Benjamin, Shameless!)

So, I decided to enter her name into Google myself, and sure enough...my little 'ol blog came up as the 3rd entry. 

Me and Google, we are tight!  We're like besties now!

So even though Ice Dancing is now over (thank God...it feels like it lasted for an entire week!), and Tanith & Belbin did not win a medal (coming in 4th overall), it appears as if she has not lost any popularity!

The team has talked about possibly retiring from figure skating.  If so, then Tanith could go on to modeling, or acting.

Or, she could parlay this into a successful career as a Hooter's girl, I'm sure!

Does the Elevator 'Close Door' Button actually work?

Oh, stop teasing me!

Yeah, I'm talking about you, special button on the elevator that stares at me, inviting me to press you, yet to be FOOLED by you once again!

After multiple attempts in my life to close elevator doors, I have come to the conclusion that the 'Close Door' button does not actually work.

NEVER ONCE have I experienced a CD button that actually began the process of shutting the door. 

Yet, in my quest to get where I am going faster, I fall for it's little game; deceiving me into thinking that I am in control!

Grrrr....

Patience, Paul, patience!

You would think that I would just give up and stop pressing the darn thing, right?  However, in the back of my mind...oh, who am i kidding....in the FRONT of my mind there is always the "What if?"

What if it actually works this time???

You know the situation:  You get in the elevator, and hear your Boss coming from down the hall.  You know that you have been procrastinating hardcore on getting that report/project done and do not want to have the uncomfortable conversation.  Close Doors, Close Doors, press harder, again, again, press!

Or this:  You get in the elevator, but reeeaaaallly have to pass gas.  So, you assess the situation and decide that it is safe to Fart away! 

Then...you hear footsteps.  DAMN!  Close Doors, Close Doors, press harder, again, again, press!

I dont know.

Clearly, associated learning didn't work too well with me!  I need my own version of a Pavlov's Dog experiment.

However, until that button starts actually 'shocking' me to dissuade me from touching it, I will probably always fall for the 'close door' button's evil scheme!

EVAN!!!!!!

Another Great Friday!!!

Good morning!  I hope you all were able to watch America's new Golden Boy, Evan Lysacek, win the gold medal in Men's Figure Skating last night. 

He is Chicagoland's very own, and he did us proud!

Speaking of Olympics, today at work, my department will be competing in our own Olympics competitions!

I am ready!  I've stretched, I'm doing breathing exercises, and I am ready to bring home a medal!

Today's events include:

*Office Chair Rowboat Push*

*Mouse Curling*

*Trashcan Basketball Relay - Flip cup Style*

*Rubberband target shooting*

*Paperclip Chaining*

*Softrax Ping Pong*

I will try to do the Dangling Carrots community proud!  I'm especially excited to see how my rubberband shooting skills are!

It's a good thing Evan doesn't work with me, or I wouldn't stand a chance!

I will keep you posted...

However, the important thing here is...Whether I win or lose in these events, I am still a winner due to the fact that I am having CHIPOTLE for lunch! 

YUM! Don't tease me!!!
_________________________

On a final note today, My Remote control works!!!

For those of you who read yesterday's post, and have sent comments, tweets, or emails...YES, my remote control is OK!

I think it just needed to thaw out.

But THANK GOODNESS, because then I wouldn't have been able to turn on the TV and watch Evan bring home the medal!  Phew!

I hope you all have an amazing weekend! Now, bring on the Chipotle burrito!!!

Where Is That F@#*!ng Remote Control!???

I swear to God, I'm losing my mind!

I came home last night around 10:30pm after having a delicious dinner with a buddy of mine, and in order to wind down before bed, I thought I would watch a little television.

I sat down on the couch and reached forward to the coffee table where I normally place the remote control.

Oh...it wasn't there!

Hmm, where did I place that?

So, I start looking on the couch, on the floor around the couch, and then in between the couch cushions...

Nothing.

What the heck?  So, i get up.  Walk over to the kitchen area...maybe I placed it on the counter?  Nope.

Did I possibly put it in my Work bag, as I was getting it ready for the morning?  Nope.

Well, I did take my contacts out.  Maybe I took it into the bathroom with me?   Nope.

What the F?

I know, I know...I had one of those crazy moments that you only see on TV, where I took something out of the fridge and placed the remote in there, right? 

Still nothing...

It HAS to be somewhere!  I just used it earlier in the evening.  Either it grew legs and walked away, or the ghost in my apartment is playing games on me!

I walked back and forth throughout my apartment 4 times, and still nothing.  I was getting to the point where I was going to have to start tearing apart my home.

God forbid I actually walk over to the television set and turn it on manually!!!

Hmmm...maybe I should just walk down to Radio Shack and buy a new one?
Damn...they're closed!

I was determined to find this darn remote control.  I thought, "If I don't show up to work in the morning, it's because I am still searching for it!"  Which might actually make me insane...

Frustrated, I decided to just turn on some light music, and fall asleep to that...

Guess what?

I woke up this morning, and was ready for some frozen Aunt Jamima pancakes.  :)

I opened the freezer, and BAM!  There is the remote, sitting peacefully next to the ice cube trays.

Damn!  I checked the fridge, but not the freezer?  Oh brother...

I realize now that I must've placed the remote in there when I was getting out the tub of Ben & Jerry's last night, which I stuffed my face with!

Just another random, idiotic moment to add to the growing tally...!

Unfortunately, when I tried turning my TV on, the remote didn't work.  I am hoping that it just needs to thaw out. 

Otherwise, I will be making that trip to Radio Shack after all!

Okay Ke$ha...I Give In!

'There ain't no scene in the VIP for me.
So you can take your class, shake your ass and drown in that martini!'

Wow, Ke$ha...You know my thoughts so well!

I admit, I didn't want to like Ke$ha.

From the get go, I saw how she spelled her name and thought, "Oh brother...another gimmick." 

However, I'm always looking for new music to run to, and when I heard her catchy song 'Tik Tok,' I knew that this would be a good one.

Turns out I was right!

So, I checked out the rest of the album and can't. stop. listening!  I guess good music always wins out.

If you like good, danceable, infectious pop music, then you must check her out too!

She's unapologetically trashy...and I find it quite refreshing!

It's nice to hear something other than pop stars/rap stars bragging about their bling or their latest designer shoes!

Anyone who knows me, understands that I am not a huge fan of the whole "velvet rope", V.I.P. scene to begin with. 

Sure, it's fun on occasion, with the right friends...but give me a corner bar, a beer, some good rock n' roll music, and great friends...and I am good to go all night!

I don't need to show everyone that I am better than them, and I am not a fan of creating the illusion that I have more money than them...or have it all together!  Plus, I want to be approachable, as the best part of going out is meeting new, fun people!

I could see myself hanging out with Ke$ha and having a great time, hangin' with the common folk, dancing the night away!

So...

I realize that she's probably an acquired taste, and isn't for everyone.

However, I have a whole new album of great running music!

The song below is called, "Take It Off" and it's definitely my new jam! 
Enjoy!




My other favorite jam:  "Your Love Is My Drug"

How do we REMEMBER all of this???

Yesterday at work, I was walking down the hallway to go to the restroom.  (Yes...Unlike many of you, I actually had to go to work yesterday!)
Grrrr!

When I arrived at the bathroom door, I froze.

What the hell is the combination to get into the bathroom???

I stood there for a moment, looking at the numbered buttons on the electronic door lock.  I have put that combination in hundreds of times before, yet I completely blanked out.

Ugh...

So, I started walking back down the hall, in order to retreive the combo from my desk.  But then, when I stopped 'thinking' about it, the combo came to me.

Yay!  Now I can pee!

It's nice to know that I'm actually smart when I turn my brain off!

But really, aren't we asked to remember WAY too much? 

This same thing has happened to me before while standing at the ATM.  For the life of me, due to a momentary lapse I couldn't remember my PIN number!

And then there's the Password that I must enter in order to log into my work computer.  Once logged in, I have 5 different passwords for the various software programs that I must use on a daily basis!

I try to make them all the same, but then inevitably, one of the programs will tell me that my 'password is about to expire.'

NO!  Then I have to choose something else and completely complicate my life!!!

On top of that, I have a password to log in to my email, one for facebook, twitter, etc...  Basically, every website I use!

Some require that i use a combination of a symbol, a capital letter, a number, etc. 
I know it's all in the name of security, but why you gotta make my life so difficult???

Throw in...

*My gym locker combination*

*The password to access my voicemail on my phone*

*My social security number*

I'm like a damn Genius!
THANK BUDDHA that I don't have to remember anyone's phone numbers anymore.  Thank you, phone technology!

Look...I had to call up RCN, my cable company, a few weeks ago to discuss an internet issue.  When I called, the representative who answered the phone asked me for my password. 

"My what?"
"Sir, your RCN password...so that I can access your account."
"Umm...do I even have one?"
"Yes, it should've been created when you signed up for service with us."
"That was 4 years ago!  You expect me to remember that?"
"Sir, would you like me to reset it for you?"
"Sure. But I warn you...I will most likely forget this one too!"

Everyone needs a password these days!

At this point, I SOMEHOW manage to remember all of this.  Hopefully, my memory will hold up as I get older!

Now, if you'll excuse me...I have to pee.  WAIT, what's that combo again???

The Facebook Relationship...and Break-up!

Good morning.  Happy new week to you all!

For those of you in loving relationships, I hope you had the most AH-mazing Valentine's Day possible, and have fallen even deeper in love with each other!

For those of you who spent the day 'Single,' then I wish for you to find great love throughout the next year, whether that be with a mate, amazing friends, or yourself!

However...If you do find 'The One' this year, then PLEASE let me caution you against something that I see all too often: 

The Facebook Relationship...and Breakup!

I am specifically talking about the couples that play out their entire courtship online for all to see.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I understand!  You are with that person who not only knocks your socks off, but also washes/dries/and folds them!

You want the world to know that you are in a relationship with this person.  Go ahead, gurl! That is wonderful.  Change your relationship status to: In a Relationship.

And if for some reason, things don't work out down the road, then you will inevitably change your status back to 'single.' 

That is not what I am talking about here...

Over the weekend, I noticed that an acquaintance of mine had recently changed his status back to 'single,' and I have to admit...something inside of me wanted to laugh. 

I know, I know...that sounds mean, and I wish him the best, I really do.  However, he had been in a relationship for the past few months, and I swear to God...I felt like I was in the relationship with them!

It was taxing, let me tell you!

Every single Facebook status update went something like this:

"My adorable boyfriend made me dinner tonight.  I love you, boo!"

"Enjoying a relaxing morning, cuddling with the love of my life."

 "Having a bowl of cereal that my baby went to the kitchen and got for me!"

"Taking a dump while my sweetie pie is taking a shower..."

Ok, the last one, I was being a tad facetious!

These status updates are not god-awful when they stand alone...it's just that they happen too f*cking often! all day long.  And it's apparent that this guy has lost any life of his own, apart from his other half!

Also, every picture that they uploaded daily was just of the 2 of them.  On their daily walk, at a nice cafe.  Hugging, kissing...  SO IN LOVE!!!

I'm happy for you, and glad that you're in love, but please stop making me want to Barf at your overwhelming joy.

Then...it happened.

While looking at my news feed a couple days ago, I saw it and will admit that I froze for a moment in shock:

"________ went from being 'in a relationship' to 'single.'"

What??? What happened?  I thought you were SO in love? 
If I read correctly, that was the person you were going to spend the rest of your life with!

And then I chuckled.

I'm sure in the next few weeks, there is a possibility that the status will change from 'single' to 'it's complicated', then to 'in a relationship,' back to 'it's complicated' again, and repeat...

You know you've seen it!

Look...I want to know that you are happy, and in a relationship. Just be smart about how you publish things.  I hope you are not declaring your undying love to someone that you have been together with for a mere few months.  Give it a little time!  Get stable, yo!

On a last note...If you ARE breaking up with someone, MAKE SURE you are the first to change that status back to 'single!'  Otherwise, you may look like you are the one still desperately clinging on...or didn't see the breakup coming!   :)

What? The Olympics start Tonight???

Umm...did you realize that the 2010 Winter Olympics begin tonight?

Yes it's true!  It snuck up on us out of NOWHERE...like a child predator at a playground.  BAM!  There it is!

I guess I knew it was coming, but where has all the publicity been?  I've barely heard anything about it?

Could it be because I live in Chicago, and because our city's 2016 summer Olympic bid was SHOT DOWN, that our media here said "F*ck it?"

OR...is it just that there really isn't much excitement?  Hmmm...

Don't get me wrong:  I LOVE me some Olympic games!
 BUT...I hardly know any of the athletes! 

Where is Michelle Kwan?  Nancy Kerrigan??? 

Come on Michael Phelps!  Couldn't you learn how to Bobsled to help out Team USA????

And where's the scandal?
What?  No crobar to the legs of Belbin & Agosto???

Well, I understand...
It's hard to be excited for sports that you rarely see on TV and you never hear the names of the athletes.

But it doesn't really matter!  As long as Team USA has elite athletes competing for medals, I will be glued to the TV.  I don't care if I've never heard your name before, or if you came from the smallest city in Idaho and have been training for the Luge since the age of 4! 

If you are a competitor for the Gold, I will be cheering you on!

Ok, here's who I do know:

Apollo Anton Ohno - speed skater (and Dancing w/ the Stars champ!)   Do us proud, yo!

Bode Miller - Skier (and my crush!)   Stay away from the alcohol til' your event is over!

Shaun White - Snowboarder (and red head)  Rock on, dude!

Lindsey Vonn - Skier   Stop getting injured!

Shani Davis - speed skater (and hothead!)  Keep calm!

Evan Lysacek - figure skater (straight guy, believe it or not...)

TEAM USA HOCKEY! - featuring the Chicago Blackhawks very own superstar, PATRICK KANE!  WOO HOO HOO!!!

Excellent!  Now let's bring home some Gold medals, USA! 
With all this excitement...I'm going to need a Lipitor!

Quote THIS!

Have you ever felt something so strongly, but just could not find the words to express what you feel? 

Then...all of a sudden you read a quote that NAILS it!  Perfecto!

That's why I like quotes.  I read, memorize and collect quotes from intellectual, influential people.  A good quote has the ability to make you think, self-reflect and inspire!

It's OK to allow yourself to feel something sometimes, y'all!
Go ahead, try it!

So, let me share with you a few quotes that I have found lately, that really made an impact on lil' ol' me!

Enjoy!


"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose."  - Jim Elliot


"In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, buy how many moments took your breath away."  - Shing Xiong


"Always put yourself in the other person's shoes.  If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts that person too."  - Unknown


"The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything, they just make the most of everything that comes their way."  - Unknown


As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will.  You'll have your heart broken, and you'll break others' hearts.  You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by.  So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt.  Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs.  You just have to live life to the fullest.  Tell someone what they mean to you, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts.  Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love, and most of all:  Live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back.

EARTHQUAKE!!!!!!!!!!!

So, this morning Northern Illinois woke up Rockin' and Rollin' to a lovely little Earthquake!

WOH!

However, it happened at 4 in the morning, while most of us were Zzzzzzzzzzing away.  Damn, I didn't even get the chance to feel it!

I did wake up around 4:30am though, but I'm sure it had nothing to do with the earthquake.  I tend to wake up 2-3 times during the night on a regular basis.  So, I decided to watch last night's HILARIOUS Chelsea Lately until I fell back asleep!

But of course, I come to work and there is ALWAYS that one person who proclaims, "Oh, Yes i felt it!  It woke me up!  It practically knocked me out of my bed!  Ahhhhh!"

Please.

Gimme a break.  You live in my neighborhood here in Chicago.  It happened around DeKalb, IL which is about an hour away...and the magnitude was only 3.8 on the Richter Scale. 

If you felt anything, it wasn't THAT scary.  Don't make me doubt everything you have ever said to me for as long as I've known you!!!

Grrr!

Now, DeKalb is my hometown.  In fact, that is where my parents currently reside.  I spent all of Junior high and High School there. 

SO, for all of my old high school friends, or anyone else who lives in DeKalb, IL...Did you feel it?

I called my mom this morning, who lives right in the middle of it all, to make sure that all is OK.  She said that there was no way that you couldn't feel it! 

My mother has an excuse to be frightened though, as she is legally blind.  I can't even imagine how it would feel to be woken up by the earth shaking, and not being able to see what is happening around you!

I would need a Boniva to calm me down!

Well...at least there are no reports of major injuries or deaths! 

Now, can I get something (or someone) to come along and make me feel the earth move under my feet?!?  Please???

Smile for the Camera!

Sometimes, I can be so stupid!

Last night, I was riding the train home from work, and I saw a guy standing at the door who had clearly just come from the gym.

He was wearing a long white dressy coat, with a pair of shorts and tennis shoes.

It looked a little silly, but nothing too crazy.  However, something in my head said, "This might make a funny photo for my excellent friend David's blog, R.O.C.K. on the CTA! 

***R.O.C.K. on the CTA is a blog dedicated to the people who ride the public transportation system here in Chicago.  Some photos are ridiculous, some are just nice to look at, and some are just plain funny!  Check it out!***

Anyway...

I decide to pull out my phone and take a picture of this guy, so I can submit it to David. 

Now, I don't generally think of my phone as a camera, as I rarely ever use it as such.  I have a digital camera, so the only time I take pics with my phone is on those rare occasions where I want to capture a moment while out with friends (and I didn't bring along my camera!)

SO...I hold the phone up, trying to look inconspicuous, like I am just looking through my text messages or something.

I line up the photo just right.  Ooh, this is going to be a good pic!

I click the button and OH CRAP!

The damn flash goes off! 

SH!T, SH!T, SH!T!!!

Clearly, everyone is now looking at me!  I'm sure they are all wondering what kind of lunatic stalker I am.  I can feel their eyes burning judgement and condemnation through me!

And the guy in the white coat & gym shorts is glaring at me, like WTF!

That damn camera flash!  How could I be so dumb to forget that my camera flash would go off?!?!

Eek! So I am sitting there, trying to play it cool, like I was just taking a random photo of the train poles or something, but I sense the awkwardness all around.

The guy in the white coat is still looking at me, like he wants to say something.  In my head, I'm thinking of excuses of how I could explain myself.  I could say something like, "Oh, i just really liked that coat...and want to see if I can find it online..."  Ugh!

I decided to do what came naturally to me:  I hightailed it off the train at the next stop!

Sure, it MAY have been cold out.  And sure, the Chicago Transit Authority MAY have just cut services, so I would be waiting for the next train for about 15-20 minutes...but this option sure beat sitting there in that highly uncomfortable situation.

And the worst part of all...the pic turned out sloppy, as I didn't even capture the guy's face. 

Damn flash!

Total Eclipse of the Heart...Literally!

I have a bit of a cold.  Ugh...

It sucks that a pesky cold has the ability to slow you down!  One minute, you are moving full speed ahead, and then the next minute, you have to take a step back and remind yourself that you are still human.

Gotta take care of yourself, y'all!

Sometimes, it's important to tell myself to slow down and stop trying to take on too many things.

Oh well...

This weekend was really fun.  However, not getting much sleep is probably what contributed to me feeling so run down.

On Saturday, our fun friends from Milwaukee came to see us.  We had a wonderful time with them!

Before heading out for a night on the town, we played a game called "Mafia," which is a game where you win by either being a member of the Mafia and killing off everyone in the room before they guess it's you, or being a regular civilian and discovering who the mafia is before they 'off' you!

So much fun.  I was Mafia twice, and I successfully won both of those rounds!  WOO!

Hmmm...Kinda scares me a bit though, that I am so good at manipulating a group of people. 

What...a killer instinct!

So...

I have to share this ridiculous video with you all! 

My friend Jeremy over at Hawking the Scene introduced me to Literal Videos.  If you go on youtube and search for "literal videos" you will find some funny clips of ridiculous music videos, except the lyrics have been changed to reflect what is happening in the video...literally!

After watching a few of these, my favorite is the "Total Eclipse of the Heart" video.  I hope you find it as awesomely amazing as I did!

Enjoy!

What...a Happy Friday!

Hello and Happy Friday to you all!

I was so tired this morning, I walked into Dunkin' Donuts and ordered a coffee.

The clerk said, "Would you like your coffee black?"
I said, "What other colors do you have?"

He he he....

OKAY!  First of all, Congratulations to my most excellent dodgeball team, The Mighty CHUCKS! 

We won both matches last night, with a record of 12-2.  WOO!

Grip those balls, Eric!

Now, if I tell you a story, promise not to cry...

I love the members of my dodgeball team very much.

Last night, I was talking to Casey, and by chance I touched his hand.

Later, he touched my hand.

What...a touching story!!!

-------------------------------------

On a serious note, I want to say THANK YOU to all of you who are following my blog.  I really appreciate the fact that you come by daily, weekly, or whenever you get a chance to read my silly thoughts!

Dangling Carrots has officially now hit over 40,000 unique visitors.  You're the best!

Look, Here's 'The Situation'...

The word is forever tainted!

As I was sitting at work yesterday, I overheard a co-worker talking on the phone.  At one point she said, "Look, here's the situation..."

Immediately, the FIRST thing that came to mind was the Six pack ab muscles that belong to Mike "The Situation" from Jersey Shore!

WHAT????

A few days ago, I was walking home from the train, listening to my ipod, and the excellent pop ditty "Damaged" by Danity Kane started playing.

Ooh...that song is one of my Jams!

Within seconds, this lyric was being sung:

"I tried every remedy but nothing seems to work for me
Baby, baby this situation's driving me crazy"

What did I immediately think about?

Those damn six-pack abs!!!

Look...He is one smart cookie!  Giving himself a nickname that is actually pretty clever, and then using it on national television?  You have to hand it to this guy!

Admit it.  You know that you think of him too whenever you hear 'the situation.'  I wonder how long this will last...

Somehow, the cast of the Jersey Shore has fist-pumped it's way into our lives! 

Now, there are reports that Mike is in the process of trademarking his nickname. 
That's a tall task, but good luck to him.

Who needs real names when you can call yourself  'JWoww' or 'Snookie'?

I'm going to start going by the nickname, "P-Dangler"

No?

"I'm Only Having ONE Drink Tonight..."

Don't lie!  At some point in your life, you've spoken this phrase as well:

"I'm only going out for a drink or two tonight."

Maybe you have an early morning; or perhaps haven't been feeling too well.  Or maybe you are just trying to be responsible!

Well, last night I decided to meet up with a couple of my best friends, Rich & Justin (shown in the pic to the right), for our regularly scheduled Martini night!

My intention was to go and have a couple of drinks, spend some "quality" moments with the guys, and then head home at a decent hour.

Now, for those of you who don't know the Kit Kat Lounge here in Chicago, they have a plethora of different martinis on their menu.  AND...if you go on a Tuesday or Sunday night, they are only $5.

That's right!  I said FIVE dollars. 

Martini's on Clearance!

Which is DANGEROUS!  (even though I'm sure they use cheap, cheap vodka on these nights!) But I was determined to stay strong tonight.

So, we order our first round.  I get the Coconut Cream Pie martini, which is a thicker drink, thinking it would sustain me longer.

Nope...it was like dessert.  Gulp, gulp...gone.

Clearly, I had to order another one almost immediately!

About 45 minutes into our stay, our exquisite friend Zach (see photo) sends a text, saying he is on his way.  He shows up shortly after, and because of my excitement to see a new pal, I think this calls for another drink!

I ordered the 'Flirtini,' which is a champagne cocktail with pineapple, and other good stuff.  However, when the drink arrived, it tasted so different this time.  I looked at Justin and said, "oh, i don't think they made this right..."

But of course I kept sipping on it!  haha...

Then finally the manager walks over and said, "I'm sorry...I believe we may have given you the wrong martini..."

Umm, does the Pope hate gay people?  Duh!  Of course you did...

So, they delivered a brand new drink to me.  It was like getting 2 for 1!

Right as I was beginning to think that I should wrap things up to head home...in walks the excellent duo of Chris and Jamon! (see pic, minus the one with boobs, of course!) 

Yay!  more friends!!!

I think this calls for another...(I am losing count at this point)...round!

We all drank, chatted, laughed, got caught up with each other, and had a great time. 

(My head may have been spinning a little, and my eyesight a little blurry...and my words 'potentially' slurring.)

So...even though my intention was to drink sensibly last night, and I actually didn't get home until closer to 1am on a school night (!), these are the nights with friends that you will always remember. So no regrets!

And hey...I woke up with NO headache this morning, and even got to work early! 

Which means I'm NOT an alcoholic, right?....

It's Voting Day, Y'all!

My father used to tell me, "You are not allowed to complain about our politicians if you don't exercise your right to vote!"

Oh dad... You silly goose!

But you know what?  He has a point!...and I have followed true to this statement since I legally was able to step into a voting booth.  It's basically saying, "If you don't like it, get off your tail and DO SOMETHING about it!", which I am a firm believer in!

Today is Primary election voting day here in Illinois, and as many of you know, Illinois has become sort of a National political joke.

With good ol' ex-Governor Rod Blagojevich being ousted from office, and former Gov. George Ryan currently sitting in prison (eesh!), we don't have the best track record here...

Even in today's paper, news broke that a former city alderman plead guilty to corruption charges of taking bribes from a developer.

God help our state!

This is why it is very important to get out there and vote!  We need to clean up this RIDICULOUSNESS!

But please don't vote blindly!  Educate yourselves first. 

My personal opinion is if it seems like Nothing is getting done, then VOTE 'EM ALL OUT!  Vote new blood in!

Now...

I never said that voting is a pleasant experience.  I merely said it was important.

This morning, I walked the block and a half to my designated polling place.  I enter the room, and immediately face Eight old, and I mean OLD elderly people staring back at me, sitting at 2 long tables.

Not one person said a word to me.  There really wasn't a line...so i just stood there.  Finally, i said, "Ummm...Where do i start?"  They all still just looked at me.

Come on, election judges.  Get it together! 

Finally one of the gentlemen speaks up, "Step over," in a tone as if my presence annoyed him.  Well, apparently I was bothering him, because when I told him my address, he barked, "You're in the wrong place."  I'm thinking, the wrong place?  I know I just checked my voter card right before leaving my house.

"You're supposed to be at the other table over there."

Oh brother...  Can I just vote already?

In the meantime, the other 7 election judges are just staring at me.  Awkward!!!

So, I step the three steps over to where I was supposed to be.  As the guy is looking through his book of registered voters, turning the pages at a snail's pace, I see him pass by my name a couple of times, but let it go...trying to be patient, knowing that he will eventually find it.

Seriously, about 2 minutes later, I finally stop him and point, "That's me right there!"  STOP

He hands the card to the lady sitting next to him, who literally takes the card and hands it to the guy next to her.  Wow, that is a real important job!  What would they have done without her showing up today!

Then, he proceeds to ask me, "Would you like a paper ballot, or an electronic one?"

Well, considering that I just saw how much time it took for him to explain the electronic balloting to the citizen ahead of me, I immediately said, "Paper!  I'll take the paper ballot!"  Yes, I've done this before, so you don't have to explain it!

So there you have it...

I performed my civic duty, y'all!  It wasn't pretty, but I did it! 

AND, I feel good about it.

Now, I hope you do yours too...

Milwaukee Fun! Oh...and Pink ruled the Grammys!

I spent the weekend in Milwaukee with some of my besties!  Sometimes it's nice to get away from your normal environment, even if only for a day or two. 

Eric, Nate, Johnny, Topher and I decided to escape the Chicago cold for...the even colder Milwaukee.

But we had a blast!

Apparently, I was so excited that I proclaimed, "The cheaps are drinker here!"  And that was even before any alcohol touched my lips!

We ate at the fantastic 'La Fuente' mexican restaurant, which had excellent margaritas, and then proceeded to go out to the bars, where we danced the night away!

In fact, Johnny was even involved in a danceoff....and of course he won!

The people were friendly and the drinks were flowing.  Can't wait for our next trip guys!

On another note:  Registration for the 2010 Chicago Marathon opened today, and naturally, I have already registered.  This will be my 3rd one, as I clearly am a glutton for punishment!

If you are planning on running it, let me know!  I love to keep connected to fellow runners, as it pushes me along and inspires me.  If you have ever thought about doing it, I urge you to sign up.  Do it quickly though, before the field is full and registration closes.  Let the training begin!

Finally, I watched the Grammy awards last night, and I have to say that this was probably one of the WORST shows they have ever put on!

There were barely any awards handed out (9 awards in 3 and 1/2 hours???)  Many of the performances looked like they were just thrown together (Jamie Foxx, Drake, Lil Wayne, Taylor Swift!...shame on you!)

The real saving grace of the show, and the spotlight moment of the night, was the absolutely amazing Pink!

Breathtaking doesn't even begin to describe her performance.  When I come up with a better word for it, I will let you know.

She wasn't the big award winner, but she stole the damn show by giving an acrobatic performance that was classy, yet exciting! 

If Pink can sing, do all that, and STILL sound incredible, then nobody has an excuse to lip sync EVER AGAIN!

A performance with 50 backup dancers couldn't compare to her alone on the stage.

Unfortunately, this morning, the reviews of last night's show include her, but they give her a mere blurb.  It is sad that we live in a society where the media can talk endlessly about the disastrous mess of a performance given a couple of months ago by Adam Lambert, but barely give a sentence or two to the brilliant display of artistry that Pink gave us.

Oh well...  Pink, you rocked it!  Thanks for that performance.

More pics of the fun Milwaukee weekend: