Monday, January 25, 2010

The Spoiled Under-30 Crowd!

If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning....

Uphill... barefoot...

BOTH ways

Yadda, yadda, yadda...

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it

and how easy they've got it!

But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.

You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter - with a pen!

Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take, like, a week to get there!

Child Protective Services didn't care if our parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our ass!  Nowhere was safe!

There were no MP3' s or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! There were no CD players! We had tape decks in our car. We'd play our favorite tape and "eject" it when finished and the tape would come undone. Cause - that's how we rolled, dig?

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either!
When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister..or princess!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics!
We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'.  Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... forever!

And you could never win.

The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off you're a$$ and walk over to the TV to change the channel!

There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK  for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-b*stards!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove! Imagine that!

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.  You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or before!

The Over 30 Crowd


  1. Thanks for the morning chuckle, Paulie! It was great to see you yesterday. You always make a situation brighter!

  2. Yes and don't forget having to actually plan a time to meet all your friends out, because without cellphones, if you were late you might have never found them for the rest of the night! You were screwed!

  3. Isn't this the truth!! I have a 13 year old niece and I see so many ways her childhood is so different from mine, thanks to technology.

  4. You just made my day.....this was so funny and so true! God, the "good ole days" ha

  5. i am cracking up!!! thank god for caller id so i know when my bookie is calling. ;)

  6. LOVE THIS! Very funny.

  7. Very clever. I especially liked "bookie." I wonder if people even know what that is anymore. I remember my dad obliquely referring to bookies - I never knew if they were his bookies nor not.

  8. I sooooooo agree with you, Paul!

    But I wouldn't change a thing.

    I was born in 1979 and it was the perfect time for me. The 80's are when cartoons were at their peak IMHO.

    Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends.
    G.I. Joe.

    The list goes on and on.

    The 80's are also when a lot of classic comic book stories occurred!

    Ah, the good ol' days!


  9. I remember when the Zack Morris phone was technology at its finest!

  10. There's so much that can be added but I'll limit it to answering machines and rotary telephones. Oh wait, remember how cool it was to record music at the beginning of your recorded message? I guess that was more mid 80's.

  11. You really made me laugh! I didn't start using a damn cell phones until like about two years ago!and now, 12 year olds have one!!

  12. Oh, and one more thing!

    Zack Morris and A.C. Slater were such hotties back in the day!

    Even as adults both Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez still are!


  13. What's a card catalog? That is the question that runs through my head when people ask me "What's Twitter?"

  14. This is so true I am larfing my arse so hard I think I just peed a little........