Friday, June 12, 2009

Who's having the Best...I mean...WORST Week Ever!

It's Friday again!
And that means that it's time to decide who has had the best week ever! Except...that it turned out to be a pretty CRAPPY week!

In a week that saw the return of the Swine Flu, and cold rainy, October-like weather here in Chicago, I would be going out on a limb to say who's having the best week. (except for my awesome Beach Volleyball team who won all 4 games last Friday night!)

Therefore, here are the Nominees for WORST WEEK EVER!

Carrie Prejean has officially been stripped of her title as Miss California. It turns out, she really was a bitch after all! She put on this innocent little, "I'm a good christian girl" act, but it turns out that's just what it act!
Donald Trump decided to give her the HEAVE-HO after reports surfaced that Ms. "Opposite Marriage Only" told California pageant directors that she was pretty much going to make her own schedule. OH HELL NO!
It also turns out that Carrie is rude, disrespectful and still needs her mom to do most of the work for her. Carrie, read your bible! Follow the commandment that says, "Thou shalt not be a BITCH." (that's in there, right?)

Bret Michaels, everyone's favorite Rocker of Love performed on the Tony Awards this week (WHAT?...Bret on the Tony's?!?!), and after his performance he missed his cue, to find a giant stage piece falling down on top of him! He was knocked to the ground, fractured his nose, and had to get 3 stitches in his lip. Looks like the "Nothing but a Good Time" singer was having too much of a good time, that he forgot where he was supposed to be on stage! That's ok...I'm sure there is a bus full of strippers and sluts waiting to take care of our precious Bret.

Heidi (Montag) Pratt also had a pretty suck-y week! On Monday. Heidi & Spencer were voted back onto "I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here" by their peers, only to leave once again! It was funny the first time, entertaining the second time, but's getting old! We get it, you wanted a publicity stunt! Well, it may have been karma, because this week Heidi got 'so sick' upon returning to the jungle that she had to be rushed to a hospital, thinking that she was suffering from a gastric ulcer. BUT...that's not the worst part. The real pain occurred when fellow contestant, Sanjiya, asked Heidi to sing a little bit from her upcoming album. IT WAS AWFUL! This bitch got a record deal??? WTF! Even Janice Dickinson said she sounded like a 'drowned cat' when she sang...

VH1's weekly Clip show, "Best Week Ever" (and my inspiration for this lovely weekly blog feature) is having a pretty bad week, as it may be on it's way out the door! The show has been put on hiatus and at the very earliest will not be back until January 2010. The program used to be really funny with commentary from many different comedians, skewing the weekly news events. However, the show was retooled with host Paul F. Tompkins late last year, and it just wasn't nearly as funny and people just stopped watching. Hopefully the show will go back to the earlier format, because it SUCKS! I mean, blows hard!!!

For the second year in a row, AOL and Comcast have finished #1 and #2 in Money magazine's "Customer Service Hall of Shame." 45% of the survey respondents gave AOL a poor rating, while 41% gave Comcast the same rating. Your companies SUCK! Get with the program! I AOL even that relevant anymore? NO. So get with the program before you become extinct! And Comcast, well that's another story. Many areas around the country are only offered one choice in Cable television, so people kind of have to put up with their ridiculousness...or buy a DirecTv. Either way, both deserve the bad publicity, as well as the rest of the Top 10 on this list!

But the winner of the worst week ever award goes to...

The Celebrity Boy Toy

This week, 2 high profile celebrities broke up with their lesser-known, fame-leaching boyfriends. Paris Hilton has broken up with 'the Hills' star...i mean...cast member Doug Reinhardt after dating for nearly 6 months! Miley Cyrus ended her relationship with underwear model Justin Gaston after nearly 9 months together.

It is debatable, saying that these guys are having the worst week ever, since now they won't have to be attached to these two ridiculous human beings. For most of us, that would be a good thing, right?

Well, not in their case. Clearly, these guys are both hungry for FAME, and by not being in the spotlight anymore, they are going to have to find some other meal ticket! Doug and Justin, because the paparazzi have probably already left you alone, you are having the WORST WEEK EVER!


  1. I say Michaels had the worst week :P

  2. That picture of heidi makes me want to punch her

  3. HAHA! Wow, Anna...Don't hold back! :)

  4. 1) I always want to punch Heidi for being one of those sluts that loves to talk about her fake boobs; way to go Anna. I'm going to print out that pic of her just because I like laughing, a lot.
    2) I'm sorry, but why is Paris so fat in that pic? Is she preggers or did her posture just get lazy in those damn unsupportive Christian Louboutin's! (and i do mean paris fat, not real fat, defensive bitches)

  5. Brooke, ur hilarious! seriously, u need ur own blog! or u should guest blog on paul's blog! now that would be hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. I've never watched The Hills or I Am A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here. I just see Heidi and her fiance's pictures in tabloid magazines all the time, and people seem to dislike both of them. I'm just wondering what they did to make people have such low opinions of them, that's all.

  7. Carrie Prejean is stupid, and by allowing her to represent California, Donald Trump is saying all Californians are homophobic, bleached blonde morons who will whip their clothes off at the mere sniff of a camera. She does have the right to exprss an opinion. We also have the right to laugh at her, repeatedly and loudly.
    One more thing - Jesus Christ, the founder of the Christian religion (not St Paul, or Moses, or the Pope, Christianity is supposed to be founded on the teachings of Jesus) didn’t say anything against homosexuality. Not one word. In fact, he said hate was wrong, and everyone should love everyone else. So all those spouting hate and hell and damnation - by the teachings of your own creator, that’s enough to damn you to hell, no-one else.

    And go Carrie Prejean - you remind everyone why these ‘beauty’ contests are so fucking awful!

  8. how do i become a hollywood boytoy?!?

  9. I really enjoy this format. Very funny. Keep up the good work Paul.

  10. Just came across your blog through random know how it is...I start googling for a new duvet and end up reading a blog from miles away!
    Any ways, I think you are witty and entertaining and obviously have quite the following. It really makes me miss my own blogging. Ever since I lost my little ones about two years ago, it just makes me upset to think about blogging. But there is more to life, and you have to keep moving, right? I am sure my newest little guys would love to get some exposure :)
    Thanks for your help. And great blog!